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Posted at 2/14/2012 12:00:00 AM
“Can We Have Best Friends of the Opposite Gender?” (ft. Priscilla)
No, this is not a mistake. This is Joel from Sarcasm Puh-Leeze and you are reading this post as part of Sarcasm Puh-Leeze's collaboration series. You reading this from Priscilla's blog is actually part of the plan. Likewise, she's already written her own post on my blog, so go there to check it out. Again I might remind you to not close your browser. There is no mistake.
Pris actually came up to me with the idea to write something about gender differences. And after much deliberation, we decided to go with the very widely discussed topic: "Can guys and girls remain as best friends and nothing more?" The post begins right after the fullstop.
I have never had a best friend of the opposite gender. Heck, I have never had a single best friend in my life. But this is an issue which is widely discussed by people. Is it possible to have a best friend of the opposite gender?
I would have to say no. As a guy, I tend to fall in like with every girl I meet. I kid you not. It's like I meet this girl and we have a bit of chemistry going on. Despite my greatest efforts to prevent it, I tend to start liking her.
And liking and liking until I end up in a sad place called the Friendzone.
Here are 3 reasons why we cannot have a best friend from the opposite gender. Remember, this is only from my point of view and if you disagree, you're most probably a girl.
#3 You can control your mind, but you can't control your heart
Look, the mind is an easy thing to control. You tell yourself that you don't want to do something and automatically your mind responds. But have you tried controlling your heart? It's so difficult because the heart is where all emotions go to die. Guess which organ decides who you fall in love with? (Hint: it's not your mind).
Your mind says, 'NO! I will never fall in like with my best friend.' Your heart says, 'I am so in love right now.'
I'll give an example of heart over mind. Just look at Toy Story 3. Many guys went into the cinema with their manly aura and came out weeping like little kids. It's not that these people are not manly enough, it's that they cannot really control their heart's feelings.
Similarly, how do you expect to control your liking of a person? If you fall in like (which will most likely happen) with your best friend, you know that it was all part of your heart's elaborate plan to screw up your friendship. Which leads me to...
#2 The Friendzone
The Friendzone. A crazy place for all the single people in the world. The Friendzone has killed so many potential relationships from even beginning. It's cruel to be put into the Friendzone for one reason: it may be called the Friendzone, but you're far from actually being friends. To be put into the Friendzone, you have to first confess your feelings for the girl. Once that is done, she will say these words to open the doors to the Friendzone, 'But...we're better off as friends right?'
Two things happen then. She will now either avoid you because she knows you have a crush on her or she will also develop a little bit of a crush on you. The former is more likely to happen. If she does develop a crush on you, this little crush will remain hidden for all eternity because girls do not take the initiative at all. And while this is happening, you will remain in the Friendzone until the next girl comes along. But that's where your problems continue...
#1 Prevents new relationships
By cruelly putting you into the Friendzone, you are now 'just a friend'. Sure you can call her your best friend and spend time doing best friend stuff with her but when someone comes along in your life, you will find out that it is not easy to escape from the Friendzone.
Imagine if she has a crush on you, and you meet someone new. You won't want to stick around with this girl because you have someone NEW! Your 'best friend' will now become your relationship's worst enemy. She will be hounding you and your potential girlfriend and you will never get a moment's peace. Jealousy can be quite a bitch sometimes.
So think about it. Having a best friend of the opposite gender may not be as good as you envision it to be. Again, this is all in my personal opinion and if you disagree with me, please leave a comment in the box below.
Read my version on Joel's blog here. :D